Monday, 13^th June 2005 | 12:31 PM
Daydreaming in June

We don't have seasons here in Singapore - it's just lots of sunny days with some rainy days depending on the monsoon. But it's June, and I understand it's summer in most parts of the world, and therefore everyone seems to be in a vacation mood. In the international English book trade, summer is when the publishing schedules pick up quite a bit, and the holiday reads like the chick-lit stuff I'm fond of, increase in numbers.

In Singapore, kids get the month off from school in June so my memories of June holidays would be lazy days at home, visiting grandparents and cousins and playing with them at their home, sleeping over at their places. Later as I grew older it would be the time for various school excursions, and worse as I enter my teens, June holidays will be spent with friends either on school extra-curricular activities, project work for projects that have to be submitted once the school starts again in the final week of June, while trying to squeeze in time for fun in between. In JC my memories of June holidays would be endless things to study for, tutorials to do, bla bla.

But you know, it beats sitting at your desk in the office, working. I miss being carefree, and the lack of structured time. No matter how much schoolwork I ever had to do, as long as I didn't have to go to school the time is mine to control and for me to decide when I have to do or finish what (usually the night before school starts, haha). Now it's no longer that way. Regardless of whether I'm feeling productive, I have to sit at my desk, do my work (or die trying) till it's time to knock off.

I'm so stressed. There seems to be so many things to do, and not enough time.

Meanwhile, I'm busy daydreaming about my plans for the new room. For the first time ever, thanks to the built-in wardrobe, shelves and desk, I'm having furniture that really match in my room. All my life I've grown up with hand-me-down furniture that are stuck in our room because of functionality, not really whether it matches everything else in the room. And I'm sick of it. As a little girl I used to go to my friends' homes and admire how they either have their own room or have furniture that all match in their room. My current wardrobe and dresser will be the old one from my parents' room when they changed their bedroom set, my desk is currently badly broken (we've had it since I was at least 3 or 4... as a kid I recalled playing underneath that desk with my sister in our old home, which we'd lived in before I was four). I don't know where the two bookshelves that are in my room now are from - my dad bought the taller one quite recently, when I was in university maybe. And when something needs replacing, my parents would replace it taking budget and functionality into consideration, whether it matches everything else in the room is secondary. I didn't whine to them, I just get very wistful when I look at other girls' rooms and home decor shows.

I'm also considering whether it's worth it right now to get a loan just so I can get a new Mac. We would have a family PC of course, but I want something of my own for my own peace of mind. I remember back in the days when my laptop was still working it was so much easier not having to use the family PC when I needed to write papers and all. And I'm also considering budget, space and whether it's more worth it as I consider which would be best for me: the Mac mini, the iMac or an iBook. The desk that is in my new room looks nice, but I guess I need to weigh in all the different things I want and the possibilities. And once my sister gets married, I get the room to myself. It'll be a while yet, but let's just say it's safe to say that she'll be married before I would.

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